In celebration of my roomate’s birthday

For someone not terribly old
You’re provocative, bless your soul
And so on this auspicious day
We must without further delay
Start our search far and wide
For a trophy wife, a beautiful bride
For future birthdays a companion
On  cold nights, in bed a fiery dragon
A wife that you can flaunt
To our chagrin, envy and moan
Then finally to all our delight
Our porn king would have lost his might
No more will we have to endure
Writings and scribblings impure
A happy and contented man is he
wife in arms, gazing lovingly
Our roses can now relax
Sans porn, sans taunt, sans sex