What do the old farts want?

(In celebration of 50th anniversary of Class ’68)

What does the old fart want?
To lift dumbbells
While the wife is not looking
Never mind if he drops it on his hand
He gets to see the nurses

What does the old fart want?
To have a six pack
While drinking beer
And bulging biceps to show
Pretend sweet young things are not looking

What does the old fart want?
To play golf everyday
So that the wife
Will let him drink beer and wine
And devote the rest of his life
Spreading the word of bak kut teh

What does the old fart want?
To cycle 100 kilometres a day
To prove how fit he is
As he dares not disappoint his young wife

What does the old fart want?
To fight evil, mankind
Intent on destroying the world
And bring a new renaissance
Of no meat diet

What does the old fart want?
To taste the finest wine and cheese
France can offer
But really wanted to be a cook
In a Chinese restaurant
If he had not spent so much time in England
Eating fish and chips

And what does this old fart want?
To get up in the morning
And have lift off

And what do the ladies want
To be cougars I suspect